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Saturday, June 13, 2009

Looking for jokes about BLONDES

A PLANE IS ON ITS WAY TO HOUSTON WHEN A BLONDE IN ECONOMY CLASS GETS UP AND MOVES TO THE FIRST CLASS SECTION AND SITS DOWN.







THE FLIGHT ATTENDANT WATCHES HER DO THIS AND ASKS TO SEE HER TICKET. SHE THEN TELLS THE BLONDE THAT SHE PAID FOR ECONOMY CLASS AND THAT SHE WILL HAVE TO SIT IN THE BACK.







THE BLONDE REPLIES, 'I'M BLONDE, I'M BEAUTIFUL, I'M GOING TO HOUSTON AND I'M STAYING RIGHT HERE.'







THE FLIGHT ATTENDANT GOES INTO THE COCKPIT AND TELLS THE PILOT AND THE COPILOT THAT THERE IS A BLONDE BIMBO SITTING IN FIRST CLASS THAT BELONGS IN ECONOMY AND WON'T MOVE BACK TO HER SEAT.







THE COPILOT GOES BACK TO THE BLONDE AND TRIES TO EXPLAIN THAT BECAUSE SHE ONLY PAID FOR ECONOMY SHE WILL HAVE TO LEAVE AND RETURN TO

HER SEAT.







THE BLONDE REPLIES, 'I'M BLONDE, I'M BEAUTIFUL, I'M GOING TO HOUSTON AND I'M STAYING RIGHT HERE.'







THE COPILOT TELLS THE PILOT THAT HE PROBABLY SHOULD HAVE THE POLICE WAITING WHEN THEY LAND TO ARREST THIS BLONDE WOMAN WHO WON'T LISTEN TO REASON.







THE PILOT SAYS, 'YOU SAY SHE IS A BLONDE? I'LL HANDLE THIS. I'M MARRIED TO A BLONDE. I SPEAK BLONDE.'







HE GOES BACK TO THE BLONDE AND WHISPERS IN HER EAR, AND SHE SAYS, 'OH, I'M SORRY.' AND SHE GETS UP AND GOES BACK TO HER SEAT IN ECONOMY.







THE FLIGHT ATTENDANT AND COPILOT ARE AMAZED AND ASKED HIM WHAT HE SAID TO MAKE HER MOVE WITHOUT ANY FUSS.







I TOLD HER, 'FIRST CLASS ISN'T GOING TO HOUSTON

Sunday, June 7, 2009

Looking for Jokes...HINDU WOMEN

FINALLY! SOMETHING WE DIDN'T UNDERSTAND!
> > >
> > > FOR CENTURIES, HINDU WOMEN HAVE WORN A DOT ON THEIR FOREHEADS. MOST OF US
> > > HAVE NAIVELY THOUGHT THIS WAS CONNECTED WITH TRADITION OR RELIGION, BUT
> > > THE
> > > INDIAN EMBASSY IN OTTAWA HAS RECENTLY REVEALED THE STORY.
> > >
> > > WHEN A HINDU WOMAN GETS MARRIED, SHE BRINGS A DOWRY INTO THE UNION . ON
> > > HER
> > > WEDDING NIGHT, THE HUSBAND SCRATCHES OFF THE DOT TO SEE WHETHER HE HAS WON
> >
> > > A
> > > CONVENIENCE STORE, A GAS STATION, A DONUT SHOP, A TAXI CAB OR A MOTEL IN
> > > THE
> > > UNITED STATES. IF NOTHING IS THERE, HE MUST REMAIN IN INDIA TO ANSWER
> > > TELEPHONES AND PROVIDE US WITH TECHNICAL ADVICE.

Saturday, June 6, 2009

Looking for Jokes..Amish Farmer Vs Muslim

An Amish farmer walking through his field notices a man drinking from
his pond, with his hand.

The Amish man shouts: "Trinken Sie nicht das Wasser, die Kuhe und die
Schweine haben in ihm geschissen!" (which means: "Don't drink the
water.The cows and pigs have shit in it!)"



The man shouts back: "I am a Muslim. I don't understand, nor do I care
to understand your gibberish. Speak English, Infidel!"





The Amish man shouts back in English: "Use both hands, you'll get more.

Looking for Jokes....Stimulus Package

JUST WANTED TO LET YOU KNOW…









I got my stimulus package in the mail today, It contained





Watermelon seeds. cornbread mix, and 10 KFC





coupons.









Have you gotten yours yet?

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