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Tuesday, April 21, 2009

Looking for jokes about cowboys!

A cowboy named Bud was overseeing his herd in a remote pasture in
Oklahoma when suddenly a brand-new BMW advanced out of a dust cloud
towards him. The driver, a young man in a Brioni suit, Gucci shoes,
RayBan sunglasses and YSL tie, leans out the window and asks the
cowboy, 'If I tell you exactly how many cows and calves you have in
your herd, Will you give me a calf?'
Bud looks at the man, obviously a yuppie, then looks at his
peacefully grazing herd and calmly answers, 'Sure, Why not?'
The yuppie parks his car, whips out his Dell notebook computer,
connects it to his Cingular RAZR V3 cell phone, and surfs to a NASA
page on the Internet, where he calls up a GPS satellite to get an exact
fix on his location which he then feeds to another NASA satellite that
scans the area in an ultra-high-resolution photo.
The young man then opens the digital photo in Adobe Photoshop and
exports it to an image processing facility in Hamburg ,Germany
Within seconds, he receives an email on his Palm Pilot that the image
has been processed and the data stored. He then accesses an MS-SQL
database through an ODBC conne
cted Excel spreadsheet with email on his
Blackberry and, after a few minutes, receives a response.
Finally, he prints out a full-color, 150-page report on his hi-tech,
miniaturized HP LaserJet printer and finally turns to the cowboy and
says, 'You have exactly 1,586 cows and calves.'
'That's right. Well, I guess you can take one of my calves,' says Bud.
He watches the young man select one of the animals and looks on
amused as the young man stuffs it into the trunk of his car.
Then Bud says to the young man, 'Hey, if I can tell you exactly what
your business is, will you give me back my calf?'
The young man thinks about it for a second and then says, 'Okay, why
not?'
'You're a Congressman for the U.S.Government', says Bud.
'Wow! That's correct,' says the yuppie, 'but how did you guess that?'

'No guessing required.' answered the cowboy. 'You showed up here even
though nobody called you; you want to get paid for an answer I already
knew, to a question I never asked. You tried to show me how much
smarter than me you are; and you don't know a thing about cows....this
is a herd of sheep.
Now give me back my dog!

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